Hidup terasa begitu penuh kejutan. Mondar mandir antara suka dan duka. Tidak sedang berada di sebuah roda berputar atau sedang mendaki gunung. Tapi sedang menjadi peran utama dalam skenario misterius dan unik ciptaan Tuhan. Tetaplah mencari "Benang Merah" dari setiap kisah nyata.

Selasa, 25 Agustus 2015

Loving you in one month

I will forget the pattern of my old writing. Now i'm going to write down all the feeling without any restriction. Yeah, today is August 24, which is exactly in the next month i will leave Berlin, Germany. The city with all sophisticated education system and an impressive public transportation system. Well, that's not really i'm going to miss, but you. We met here in Berlin, we have no one at that time, we don't know anything about Berlin at that time, we are just like Aliens who have left our daily life in our homeland. We're not looking for someone to be a special person in our life, we were just attending an official invitation, just it.

Day by day we always be together, i showed you my love that i've never done before. I knew that you need time to believe, to understand and to confess all of these things. I'm always happy around you, just to be beside you, is all i want to. Month by month, we were talking further about the future, some challenges remain there, waiting to solved. I remember when you open your note, then ask me to write down my future list, my plan. I wrote all those plans on my head, actually you just made me more in love with you, to have a woman with "plan oriented" is all that i need. In the other hand, we just heading another problem, that we realized that you will stay there and i will stay there, at least distance will separate us for a long time.

My mother few days ago said that, "I can't say no to your choice, if you love her, go ahead" she said tenderly. What a mother, i love you mom. By time, one by one problem in our relationship is resolved. I just remember one quote, "If there is a will, there is a way". In Islam, there is a Hadist said like this, "Innamal a’malu binniyat" that means "all actions are based on the intentions". Thus, all of your plan will precisely depend on your heart, your good intention, Allah will always hear that.

So, in the last month of our time, i just want to be with you as long as possible. Let's go to another hidden paradise spot in Berlin. Ich liebe dich, mein Stern.

with love.

Berlin, August 24, 2015

Tubagus Aryandi Gunawan

Minggu, 21 Juni 2015

Sometimes


Sometimes you do not have to do your best,
sometimes you just need to do what is necessary.

Sometimes you should not believe what have you been thinking,
sometimes it would be better to believe what others say.

Sometimes you must help the other people first,
sometimes to help yourself first is even more crucial.

Sometimes you will go with the compelling reason,
sometimes you will go without any substantial purpose.

You will never know what is right, if you never get wrong.
Sometimes you let the truth as a mystery.

You will never win the game, if you only watch it.
Sometimes the game ends without a winner.

Thus, when will that "sometimes" occur?
you're supposed to know it.


Berlin, June 21, 2015

Tubagus Aryandi Gunawan

Kamis, 18 Juni 2015

Juara Kedua



Berapa banyak lagi cemburu, berapa banyak bual?
Terhanyut menepis realita, kau bukanlah milikku
Aku pilihan, kaulah jawaban, jelaskan arti adil
Tolong menetap utuh karena aku letih berbagi

Mampukah kekasihmu setangguh aku?
Menunggu tapi tak ditunggu, bertahan tapi tak ditahan

Sampai kapan kau mau begini? Menjalani kisah rahasia
Tak sadarkah di balik senyuman, sungguh aku terluka?
Jika kau tidak bisa pastikan, sudahlah aku mengalah saja
Kau adalah pemenang walaupun aku juara kedua

Pada sebuah titik bifurkasi, sudikah kau mengerti?
Aku ingin cuma ada kita tanpa dustai dia

Aku memberimu yang terbaik
mengapa dia mendapatkan apa yang terbaik darimu?

(written by: Fiersa Besari)

Kamis, 04 Juni 2015

The only one



I knew my self very well,
i knew who i am,
i knew my weakness,
i knew what makes me upset.

I knew my self since a long time,
i knew my body,
i knew what i want to,
i knew why i became so lazy.

Then for what all of these things?
If i know only half of you,
or even less.

I want to live together with you,
a woman that i don't know, entirely and truthfully
i want to spend all the rest of my time to know you, the only woman that i adore.

I want to live together with you,
a woman that probably will makes me mad,
i want you to be the only one reason why i have to apologize and forgive.

I want to live together with you,
a woman who in the following years will be not pretty anymore,
i want to be the only one person who will completely records your change.

I want to live together with you,
a woman who will makes me bored to hear her story,
i want us to be the only one who always thicken the love, till inaudible and no tremble anymore.

I want to live together with you,
a woman who will see me wrecked by money and position,
i want you to be the only one place where i will complain contemptibly.

I want to live together with you,
a woman who will be abandoned one by one of her beloved parents,
i want my self to be the only one place where you can lie down, comfortably and lastly.

I want to live together with you,
a woman who will raise my children become precious for the religion and the state,
i want us to be the only one who makes our children proud and what are they pray for.

I want to live together with you,
a woman that makes me know how fabulous the love is, and how painful the faithfulness to loving someone is,
i want my life will not full of regret just because i ignored you, the only one part of my love.

Definitely everybody will ready to asked to live happily and wealthy,
But i'm ready as well to live within heartsick and without luxurious from God,
only with you, i'm ready to be carried by God, wherever and however.
Ah! i want you, yes, just you, the only one.

By the guy who is still with longing for you.


Berlin, June 4 2015

Tubagus Aryandi Gunawan

Rabu, 06 Mei 2015

Spree



I still remember how calm the water is.
As calm as the night.

I still commemorate the most beautiful smile.
As beautiful as the full moon.

Nothing can resemble that night.

It's more like i had a rejuvenation in my life,
you were truly making me feel brand new.

Ducks and drakes played above the Spree,
without any worry the deepness of the river.

Oberbaum bridge stood more than a hundred years,
stays robust and impressive together with its best goodness.

They were that we have seen.

We sat to enjoy the grace between us
We forgot the world only for us.

Every story has a beginning.
No one will know the end of the story but God.

We are what we are,
just like the beautiful Spree, nothing can be hidden.


Berlin, May 6, 2015

Tubagus Aryandi Gunawan

Kamis, 16 April 2015

Tanah Airku




Rabu, 15 April 2015

If the Star of Earth is Not Sun



Crowded place did not deter me to see you at that night.

Blink and hustle....
Shindig and babble....

Still, i was gazing on you.
Drowned deep by everything on you.

A moment of trepidation and curious mingled at the same time.

I collected all tremendous courage and bravery.
Until came my audacity to ask your beautiful name.

I got your dazzling smile and your alluring soul for the first time.

A terribly clumsy guy has danced ahead her, me.
I don't care, i just want to close with her.

The warmest halation, like no any distinction between you and sun.

This feeling grew rosier day by day.
I'm in effusive love, since i found that bright gush.

I worked very hard to overcome this feeling stay calm.

Grateful i've been lighted by you
The more i know you, the more i love you.

And yesterday, the night seems have been created only for us.

Salty and bitter....
Homesick and nostalgic....

We sensed our feeling through plate and mug.
We also tasted our sensation through pictures and stars.

If the star of earth is not sun, then it must be you.

Who always shining on me every day,
Don't go away, because i never want to walk in pitch black.


Berlin, April 15, 2015

Tubagus Aryandi Gunawan

Jumat, 20 Februari 2015

Escapade of Incognito


you've accused me many things
and also pushed me many ways

and i don't even like it, probably no one will like it.

It's more than just torture for me
strung up by sorrow

something i know nothing about how to overcome all of these

i believe no pure coincidence
i'm sure that i had strayed

no matter how meager the way and time to come out

just desire to numb all the day
or to obscure these heinous thoughts

gazing around devoid of any expression

i felt cornered
trembling inside

i need to be salvaged by someone out there

no more crestfallen
what a foolish catastrophe

our fate may not turn out any rosier

all of distinction between us
i felt nauseous

the world seems never been created for us

your suspicions only makes you apprehensive
why are you pestering yourself? over and over again

i just overwhelmed of being guy you've always wanted

amongst the hustle and bustle days
this is the end to hostile to myself

i'm not a beggar of any love

never again astonished by fake vow
i was surrendering to my emotion

my last pleading, please lose your grasp on me, don't fret.

see my clumsily visage
then look into my eyes

eyes are window to the soul of any incognito

don't believe anybody
don't depend anybody

make up your own mind, build your own independence


Egypt, February 20, 2015

Tubagus Aryandi Gunawan

Sabtu, 07 Februari 2015

Ich Lass Für Dich Das Licht An



Wenn wir Nachts nach Hause gehen
die Lippen blau vom Rotwein
und wir uns bis vorne an der Ecke
meine große Jacke teilen
der Himmel wird schon
morgenrot
doch du willst noch nicht schlafen
ich hole uns die alten Räder
und wir fahren zum Hafen

Ich lass für dich das Licht an
obwohls mir zu hell ist
ich hör mit dir Platten
die ich nicht mag
ich bin für dich leise
wenn du zu laut bist
renn für dich zum Kiosk
ob Nacht oder Tag
ich lass für dich das Licht an
obwohls mir zu hell ist
ich schaue mir Bands an
die ich nicht mag
ich gehe mit dir in die
schlimmsten Schnulzen

ist mir alles egal
hauptsache du bist da

ich würde meine
Lieblingsplatten
sofort für dich verbrennen
und wenn es für dich wichtig ist
bis nach Barcelona trempen
die Morgenluft ist viel zu kalt
und ich werde langsam heiser
ich seh nur dich im Tunnelblick
und die Stadt wird langsam leiser

ich lass für dich das Licht an
obwohls mir zu hell ist
ich hör mit dir Platten
die ich nicht mag
ich bin für dich leise
wenn du zu laut bist
renn für dich zum Kiosk
ob Nacht oder Tag
ich lass für dich das Licht an
obwohls mir zu hell ist
ich schaue mir Bands an
die ich nicht mag
ich gehe mit dir in die
schlimmsten Schnulzen

ist mir alles egal
hauptsache du bist da

ich lass für dich das Licht an
obwohls mir zu hell ist
ich hör mit dir Platten
die ich nicht mag
ich bin für dich leise
wenn du zu laut bist
renn für dich zum Kiosk
ob Nacht oder Tag
ich lass für dich das Licht an
obwohls mir zu hell ist
ich schaue mir Bands an
die ich nicht mag
ich gehe mit dir in die schlimmsten Schnulzen

ist mir alles egal
hauptsache du bist da

Wenn wir Nachts nach Hause gehen
die Lippen blau vom Rotwein
und wir uns bis vorne an der Ecke
meine große Jacke teilen

- Revolverheld -

Kamis, 05 Februari 2015

Angus & Julia Stone


Angus & Julia Stone - Hollywood



Angus & Julia Stone - Stranger


Angus & Julia Stone - Just a Boy




Angus & Julia Stone

just what i'm always hearing to..

Jumat, 30 Januari 2015

Jangan Salah


di kesendirian,
terlalu banyak pesan yang datang terlambat,

sebanyak,
banyaknya isi pesan yang tidak terpahami.

namun, 
pesan terdalammu itu kini telah hanyut ke dasar hatiku.

bahwa,
aku akhirnya jatuh sesal pernah berperangai begitu buruk.

walau,
aku masih tidak pernah menyesali pula, waktu-waktu aku melepaskanmu.

kini biarkanlah,
aku tetap bertanya-tanya.

kenapa,
tuhan menyatukan kita terlalu cepat, di saat-saat aku belum juga lebih baik.

ketika,
semua kebaikan dikalikan nol oleh satu kesalahan, memberi ampun pun terkesan keliru.

ketika,
kemauan untuk mengalah jadi begitu mahal untuk dapat dipilih.

mungkin juga,
sebenarnya aku sedang rindu bercerita panjang segala hal denganmu.

jangan salah,
hanya sebatas itu saja, tidak pernah lagi punya maksud untuk lebih.

oleh yang masih bersama pesan-pesanmu,

Aku.


Mesir, 30 Januari 2015

Tubagus Aryandi Gunawan